Fight the Power
Every now and then I write something on this here blog and the reaction sometimes astounds me. That’s just what happened last week when I wrote a post about being ladylike. While I knew there would obviously be people who would disagree with me, I didn’t expect people to find the mere concept of respecting oneself and having a little decorum and manners offensive. Feminism has truly done a number on our generation.
And please, before you get your already twisted knickers into an even bigger knot, take a Xanex and chill the hell out for a second. Believe it or not, I do actually consider myself a feminist. I believe in my rights and the rights of women everywhere, all over the world and Lord knows, I’m very vocal about that. So, when, as one of the more ludicrous comments I’ve ever had on this blog suggested that particular blog post meant that I don’t believe in women’s right to vote, I could do nothing but slam my head against my desk.
Let me be clear: I believe in being a lady, I believe in the power of presentation and take great pride in the way I choose to present myself. I wear lipstick and heels. None of that, has one iota to do with my rights as a woman. None of it. Nowhere in that blog post did I say we should all be meek and mild and only speak when spoken to. If you read this blog regularly or know me in person, you would know that I am far from fitting into the meek and mild category. I’m exceptionally opinionated, sometimes about things I have no business having an opinion on, but I’ll damn well have one – you know why? Because women like my grandmother lived through a time where her voice didn’t count.
But I can’t say I’m mad at that commenter. She, like the others who said the post is a giant step back for feminism are merely misguided. I think when most people think of feminism, they think of burning bras and hairy arm-pitted women stripping themselves of all the ideals a patriarchal society weighed us down with. Well ladies, how about you move it forward 40 years or so? Believe it or not, the movement has progressed somewhat. Feminists now come in all forms.
The ‘Laddette’ movement in the 90s is largely responsible for women being so outraged at the idea of behaving like a lady. According to that, we should be trying to go toe to toe, pound for pound with men, drink them under the table, have emotionless, promiscuous sex, belch, fart and curse your way around town with the lads. If that’s what you want to do, more power to you – but just because I choose to not conduct myself that way, it does not make me less of a woman and certainly not less of a feminist. I don’t feel as though I have to hate men or let my armpit hair grow to make that point.
How people find the concept of ladies not being drunk in public or fighting, or getting into a car with their knees together offensive, truly does baffle me. But hey, if you don’t want to do that, that’s your right, thank goodness. However, to make out as if I’m setting women back by suggesting we should conduct ourselves with a little decorum? Well, you can (and I mean this in as polite and ladylike way as possible), quite frankly, kiss my lipstick wearing, high heeled ass.
Cosmopolitan has launched its Blog Awards and I would be so grateful and honoured if you would take a moment to nominate Bangs and a Bun in the ‘Lifestyle’ category. It only takes a second and I will love you long time if you do. Click here and make my day. Thank you!