Pregnancy Pay Day?
You know, I like to think we’ve come a little ways as women. What with us having the vote now and everything, we’ve made some significant changes. Hark at all the opportunities we now have! Ones that our grandmothers would’ve loved to have had available to them. So when I saw Marie Claire tweet last week that women are apparently tricking rich men into having their babies, I couldn’t help but wonder, are we taking three steps forward and two steps back?
I take issue with the article saying women ‘tricking’ men into having unprotected sex is a ‘growing trend’ based seemingly on the word of one lawyer. There doesn’t appear to be any statistical evidence to back this up. Also, babies aren’t born of these situations purely because of the evil trickery of women. Last time I checked, there were usually two people involved in the making of a baby. If these fellas are having unprotected sex on a one night stand based purely on the fact that the woman says she’s on the pill, well, that kind of stupidity deserves to be rewarded.
Why we’re acting like these men are poor, helpless creatures who have no control over where their penises (penii?) go is beyond me. Let’s at least pretend that they have a little responsibility for their actions. If we haven’t learned by now that actions have consequences, then perhaps these people shouldn’t be having sex at all. It’s pretty much Birds & Bees 101 that unprotected sex produces babies, so let’s all get a grip on the ‘men not being responsible’ thing. Also, men can donate sperm to sperm banks and make money from that – granted, it may not be as big or as long a pay off, but if the beef here is about women using their bodies as pay days, the principle here is similar.
However, all that said, if women really are doing this, if it really is a growing trend, well damn, I thought we were doing a little better. Though I must say, the raising of a child is hardly an easy pay day. Surely there are easier ways to make a buck. But I guess if an office or whatever isn’t your thing, then this may suit you. I’d hardly say the moulding of a young mind is not easy going.
I absolutely do not think it’s fair to ‘trap’ a man into fatherhood and condemn any woman who does so. To bring a child into that mess is unfair and unnecessary. It relates back to this culture of entitlement. I have reproductive organs and you slept with me, therefore, you should owe me for the rest of your life. It’s ridiculous. Aim higher – we have more options now. However, this type of reportage also leads men of no significant financial means mistakenly believing they’ve been ‘tricked’ into fatherhood too. Then we end up with women who are dealing with enough as it is, having to chase and convince a man to look after his child.
It’s a complicated game either way you look at it. Having a baby to better your own financial situation seems to go against everything parenting is about. I don’t have children, but what I’ve learned from my own parents and those around me is that it involves a whole lot of sacrifice. I imagine the amount you have to give up is a bit of a slap in the face for anyone who was expecting a windfall of child support to drop on their doormat every month.
Swings and roundabouts y’all. Swings and roundabouts.