Posts Tagged ‘a crap load of kids’

Jon & Kate Plus 8 (Bitch Slaps)

Thursday, June 4th, 2009

 

OMG you guys. So, by now I’m sure you’ve heard the crushing news that Jon and Kate’s (of Jon and Kate Plus 8 fame) marriage is on the rocks. 

 

In case you’re unfamiliar with these reality TV whores, they had twins and decided to have fertility treatment to have ‘just one more.’ ‘Just one more’ turned out to be sextuplets and a reality TV dream was born. 

 

If anyone has ever watched the show, it’s not much of a mystery why the relationship is over. Poor Jon hasn’t been able to finish a sentence in ten years. 

 

It’s been reported that Jon’s been having an affair. If that’s the case – more power to him. He should be rewarded with a gaggle of virgins for putting up with that madwoman wife. 

 

I’m not sure which of them came up with the bright idea of having fertility treatment after having two kids (but I’ll take ‘Bitchy Women Named ‘Kate’ For 100′). Greedy buggers. Are you trying to show off exactly how much a human stomach can expand? We all saw it Kate and we were all equally disgusted. 

 

But I think we all know the real reason Jon has stepped outside the marriage: Kate’s hair. What the fuck is going on there? That long sweeping bang at the front and the short, spiky punk party at the back? There’s entirely too much going on. Short, long, highlights – arrggghhh make it stop! 

 

So Kate, the key to saving your marriage clearly lies in a good hair stylist. 

 

You’re welcome.

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