Wednesday, September 10th, 2008
The last time I was in an educational establishment, I was the teacher (yep, there’s a whole area of Tokyo speaking terrible English, thanks to me), but being a student again brings about mixed feelings. On the one hand, I’m glad I’m doing something to better myself and get me one step closer to the global domination that is, my ultimate goal. On the other hand, I’m studying something I’m not familiar with and there’s a very high possibility I will look like a complete dunce.
I centred my whole day around the fact that I was going to class that evening. I’d arranged to leave work early and I must have reminded my boss of this point at least four times. On my lunch break, I went shopping for school supplies, then I gave myself a slap when I realised we’d be doing everything on computers anyway, so I should stop being an utter loser.
I finally left work and biked down to the college. I got caught in a storm on the way. The rain was pelting me so hard I cursed like a sailor the whole way. I got there, locked up my bike, battled through the crowds to find which room I was in, only to find I was in a whole other building. I went back out into the rain, unlocked my bike and rode to the next location. With minutes to spare, I rushed into the classroom only to realise that the white top I was wearing was soaked through. I may as well have introduced myself ‘Hi, I’m Muireann. And these are my breasts.’ I took up residence in the back row to avoid any embarrassment.
Things in class moved quickly and I struggled to keep up. Yes, I am that annoying one who asks all the questions, but I paid my money like everyone else, so shuddupayaface!
Things went smoothly until the teacher decided to do a little roll call of names to see who was there. As we know, that never goes well for me. This guy butchered my name beyond belief. Usually I recognise it even among all the mispronunciation, but this one threw me for a loop, to the point where I figured I just wasn’t on the list at all. Once the error was realised, the predictable discussion about the lack of correlation between spelling and pronunciation took place. Ummm, can we just Photoshop random peoples heads on the wrong bodies please?
Anyway, lesson of the day: edumacation is good. Sitting through it with a straight face when you look like a contestant in a wet T Shirt competition, is even better.